Zombie-Fied Bandersnatch.

robotmayo: [Reddit] I LOVE THIS ACTRESS WITH A FIERY PASSION....

Thu, 02 May 2013 15:53:46 -0700

[Reddit]

I LOVE THIS ACTRESS WITH A FIERY PASSION. <3

heysawbones: A Proud Moment. I don’t have a degree in eating...

Wed, 03 Apr 2013 19:54:30 -0700

A Proud Moment.

I don’t have a degree in eating blocks of cream cheese, which sucks because I’m sure it would add a lot of value to my CV. (Instead, I have “lying, poorly”. Does that count?).

I did eat a block of cream cheese once, though. I remember it fondly, because it was one of the proudest moments of my life. This probably says a lot about me, though god only knows what.

I used to be part of a youth group, which is to say, yes, I was part of a church once. I was the “youth leader”, which is the church’s way of saying, “you are the only person in the youth group who doesn’t roll your eyes at us, when we talk to you.” What they did not know is that - aside from not actually being terribly religious - I had made the youth minister my sworn enemy.

He was a weird guy. Very young; not too bright, frankly. Had a goatee, because the law requires all youth ministers to have goatees. It’s true. Look it up. He told us that Mormons owned Pepsi-Cola, and that The Gay Agenda created yaoi to recruit young men, the latter of which “fact” was really, really funny. A lot of the things he did were not so funny. Once, we went to a nursing home, where he decided to jump up and down in the elevator. He knew, of course, that I had an elevator phobia. I asked him to stop. He began sing-screaming, LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN as he jumped. A chaperone asked him to stop, couldn’t he see I was afraid? I backed into the corner and crouched there, clinging to the railing. That was the day he became more than just a moron. That was the day I decided I would make his youth-group life a hell.

Most of the time, all I had to do was ask real questions about the Bible, and then ask him questions about his answers, and so on and so forth until he ran out of excuses, or said something deeply embarrassing. One day, he was trying to explain why it was still totally okay for parents to stone their kids to death for disobeying. He was flustered; inarticulate. I pulled a room-temperature block of Philadelphia cream cheese. He watched me unwrap it as he rambled on. I took a bite. I locked eyes. I did not look away. I ate in silence. There was confusion written all over his features. His sentences tumbled apart into further incoherence, and faded away. He was afraid.

I cherish that moment.

Can’t. Stop. Laughing. I love your dear stranger and I wish I had been there to see that!

Reblog if a man has ever tried--no matter how 'sweetly'--to make you change your mind when you said "no"

Tue, 19 Mar 2013 13:39:51 -0700

wendyrm:

hazellazer:

Curious how often this happens.

My refusal should be never anybody’s new pet project. Fuck that noise.

It’s perfectly okay to use peer pressure and sweet, sweet persuasiveness to get her shaky ‘Ok’, right? :/

: Carly's Supernatural fanfiction recommendation specialty list: NSFW edition

Fri, 08 Mar 2013 17:48:53 -0800

: Carly's Supernatural fanfiction recommendation specialty list: NSFW edition:

dreamboatsandtrenchcoats:

Note: This is one part of a series of specialty rec lists I have planned out. This is basically all the porn that is in my current rec lists put into one nice list for all you perverts, because let’s face it, we’re all perverts. Don’t deny it.

I have many NC-17…

because i needed a good req list to dig up later <3

winchestercoldplayer: whilebethsleeps: estoyestudiando: This...

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 21:56:03 -0800

winchestercoldplayer:

whilebethsleeps:

estoyestudiando:

This post makes me very uncomfortable.

And you screwed it up

Human error. Gotta love it.

leslieseuffert: Natsumi Hayashi ”A sweet-looking Japanese girl...

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 16:09:10 -0800

leslieseuffert:

Natsumi Hayashi

”A sweet-looking Japanese girl who, one day, decided to take self-portraits..of herself levitating. She can be spotted in and around Tokyo, equipped with her SLR and her self-timer. When she feels the moment strike, she presses the shutter button down and then, quite literally, “jumps” into place. What I love most about her shots is that they don’t feel forced. Natsumi has a way of making us feel as though she naturally levitates throughout life. When I asked her how others react to her jumping around Tokyo, here is a funny story that she shared. “One day, when I was jumping at a famous sightseeing spot in western Tokyo, workers at a souvenir shop were frightened by how I was jumping. They were whispering things like ‘Is the girl mentally ill’ and ‘Do we need to call the police?’ “So I stopped jumping and apologized to them by saying, ‘I am taking jumping photos for my wedding party’s slide show.’ Their faces turned bright red, and they said things like ‘Oh dear!’ and ‘Congratulations!’ and even ‘Keep jumping!’

adorbs

thescienceofjohnlock: atlinmerrick: The best fandom cross-over...

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 18:03:52 -0800

thescienceofjohnlock:

atlinmerrick:

The best fandom cross-over in the history of ever.

libraryghost:

”You think we can catch him?”

”Dean, we’ll DIE.”

”He’s gotta be like 130 pounds at most, man, come on. Don’t be girl.”

”He’s falling from like a billion stories up!”

”Cas fell down from that high one time, remember? He was fine.”

”HE CAVED IN THE ROOF OF A CAR DEAN.”

—

”Do you think they’ll try to catch you?”

”Probably. Idiots.”

Re-blogging cause this is the best.

This really, really is the best. <3

chudobs: berrizcombo: thepivotsxxd: leftbehindtime: swimming...

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 18:01:07 -0800

chudobs:

berrizcombo:

thepivotsxxd:

leftbehindtime:

swimming vagina

Here we watch the Vagina in it’s natural habitat.

Be free vagina !

Truly a beautiful creature

There is no god.

findchaos: I’m just no good at showing all of that bubbly joy...

Mon, 25 Feb 2013 18:13:00 -0800

findchaos:

I’m just no good at showing all of that bubbly joy inside me.

My problem in a nutshell. Stupid cameras.

Hey Theodore Roosevelt, remember that time someone tried to assassinate you, but you just laughed and proceeded to give a 90-minute long speech with the bullet lodged in your lung, where it remained for the rest of your life? Or when you tore up your leg after being thrown into piranha-infested waters while exploring uncharted Brazil? Or all those times you broke your ribs from falling off horses while doing badass jumps? Or when you destroyed the sight in your left eye in a White House boxing match? Or that time you killed a cougar in a knife fight (seriously)? And how the only way death could finally get to you was in your sleep, in the early morning on January 6th in 1919. Here's to TR as the infinite inspiration for pure, condensed badassery.

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 21:31:18 -0800

lilyliqueur:

fuckyeahhistorycrushes:

alexandraplumpkin:

furnweh:

Theodore Roosevelt, October 27, 1858 – January 6, 1919

“Death had to take him sleeping, for if Roosevelt had been awake there would have been a fight.”

Original Badass.

All of our presidents combined can’t add up to how much of a badass he was.

TR Appreciation Post ‘12

Not to mention he was an attractive mother fucker.

And most importantly, he rode Moose.

That’s President Mr Badassery to you, good sir.

ask-the-fearling-rapunzel: I will NEVER stop reblogging this.

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 21:27:19 -0800

ask-the-fearling-rapunzel:

I will NEVER stop reblogging this.

anzu-ai: tiger-in-the-flightdeck: demon-with-a-gun: bunnika: ...

Wed, 20 Feb 2013 19:25:33 -0800

anzu-ai:

tiger-in-the-flightdeck:

demon-with-a-gun:

bunnika:

tragiquexcomedy:

shorthairednymph:

vampishly:

nessuno:

dying-enlightened:

skellagirl:

borghal-rantipole:

YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES

This is the only one of these I will ever reblog

Reblogging again because it is the TRUTH.

They are the couple I strive to be

THIS ^

YES PLEASE GOD SEND ME MY GOMEZ

“How long has it been since we waltzed?”
“Oh, Gomez… hours.”

I idolized them as a kid. And I wanted to marry Morticia. Still do.

They were everyone’s OTP at one time. If you try & say otherwise— YOU BE LYING!!!

AND THEY WERE PERFECT PARENTS TOO!

They were fiercely proud of their children’s accomplishments.

They played together as a family.

They went to school plays, parent/teacher interviews, and helped with school work.

They co-parented, Gomez was just as active in raising their children as Morticia was.

When their children wanted something that they disapproved of, they were disappointed but relented because it would make them happy.

“You still love me? The old ball and chain?”

“Of course!”

“I’ll get them.”

All. of this! <3

Christ I just had a horrible thought.

Wed, 20 Feb 2013 19:16:14 -0800

It’s pretty damned shitty to realize that you’re default thought process is ‘the cheapest I can find’ and thereby settle for instead of actually finding something I genuinely like and thereby want.

Is this the thinning of the middle/working class thought process? Or have I just unknowingly been one of the poor all my life?

I should totally write and illustrate creepy things like this....

Thu, 14 Feb 2013 16:41:32 -0800

I should totally write and illustrate creepy things like this. <3

kendra-p: Howdy kiddos! So…dang. I started up this tumblr three...

Wed, 13 Feb 2013 16:43:00 -0800

kendra-p:

Howdy kiddos!

So…dang. I started up this tumblr three weeks ago and it’s been way more successful than I anticipated. (Mostly thanks to my dumb shark sketches hah) I just reached 500 followers today! So many of you guys are amazing artists AND REALLY I JUST WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU ALL THANK YOU SO MUCH <3

So, I’ve seen other people doing art giveaways of sort and figured that I would do the same. Since I like to draw stuff and all.

SO IT’S KENDRA’S 500 FOLLOWER ART GIVEAWAY YAAAY

How do you participate?

Reblog this post! As many times as you want, I don’t care!

You do not need to be my follower, but it would be totally cool if you were.

Likes do not count.

PRIZES? You know it.

A digital colored sketch, similar to this or this. Basically just a character or 2, solid colored background, and some basic shading.

I will draw your original characters or anything from whatever fandom you dig OR WHATEVER YOU WANT (as long as it doesn’t make me horribly uncomfortable)

YOU MUST HAVE AN ASK BOX so I can contact the winner and ask whatchoo want, foo

I will decide a random winner next Wednesday (February 20!) around 6 pm EST. Go crazy!

SHARK WOMAN AWESOMENESS.
That’s really all I can think of, lol. Her art is amazing!

i never disrobe before a gunfight: How to, like, write cover letters and resumes and know what jobs to apply to and shit.

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 14:44:03 -0800

i never disrobe before a gunfight: How to, like, write cover letters and resumes and know what jobs to apply to and shit.:

morgulblade:

Basically I have been blessed to be close to people who work in hiring and were very, very willing to pass along their knowledge and tips and since a lot of people I know on here seem mystified by these things, I will share my vast wealth of knowledge with you*

*Some of this knowledge might be…

Useful info…

kendra-p: Sharks coping with contemporary inconveniences lol~...

Wed, 06 Feb 2013 19:06:48 -0800

kendra-p:

Sharks coping with contemporary inconveniences

lol~ i love this so much <3

"[TW: Sexual Assault, rape culture, victim blaming] His lips crushed mine, stopping my protest. He..."

Wed, 06 Feb 2013 14:40:11 -0800

“

[TW: Sexual Assault, rape culture, victim blaming]

His lips crushed mine, stopping my protest. He kissed me angrily, roughly, his other hand gripping tight around the back of my neck, making escape impossible. I shoved against his chest with all my strength, but he didn’t even seem to notice. His mouth was soft, despite the anger, his lips molding to mine in a warm, unfamiliar way.

I grabbed at his face, trying to push it away, failing again. He seemed to notice this time, though, and it aggravated him. His lips forced mine open, and I could feel his hot breath in my mouth.

Acting on instinct, I let my hands drop to my side, and shut down. I opened my eyes and didn’t fight, didn’t feel… just waited for him to stop.

”

- Twilight: Eclipse p. 331 (Bella and Jacob’s first kiss)

This is rape culture.

Young women are taught to think of this passage - which describes sexual assault - as erotic. Young men are taught to force their will on young women, regardless of any (non)verbal cues, because sex is conquest and women are objects - not something to be done between two consenting individuals because it’s pleasurable for both people.

The most frightening thing about this excerpt is that many survivors of sexual assault who have disclosed to me describe stories that sound exactly like this one.

(via profeministbro)

tumblr user clockward submitted this to us. read at your leisure.

(via robert-pattinson-hates-his-life)

Vomiting everywhere

(via arilyn-anson Well shit, i didn’t know it was this bad. Wow. (via fuckthacistem)

The lines before that:

    He still had my chin—his fingers holding too tight, till it hurt—and I saw the resolve form abruptly in his eyes.
    “N—-” I started to object, but it was too late.

And after he assaulted her she punched him in the face but due to his “super human strength” she broke her hand, said “Don’t touche me!” and then:

    “Just let me drive you home,” Jacob insisted. Unbelievably, he had the nerve to wrap his arm around my waist.

    I jerked away from him.

And then:

    When he got in the driver’s side, he was whistling.

AND THEN while he was driving:

    “…There is so much I can give you that he can’t. I’ll bet he couldn’t even kiss you like that—-because he would hurt you. I would never, never hurt you, Bella.”

    I held up my injured hand.

    He sighed. “That wasn’t my fault. You should have known better.”

And then:

    He grinned over at me. “You kissed me back.”

    I gasped, unthinkingly balling my hands up into fists again, hissing when my broken hand reacted.

    “Are you okay?” he asked.

     “I did not.”

    “I think I can tell the difference.”

    “Obviously you can’t——that was not kissing back, that was trying to get you the hell off me, you idiot.”

    He laughed a low, throaty laugh. “Touchy. Almost overly defensive, I would say.

    I took a deep breath. There was no point in arguing with him; he would twist anything I said.

Then when she gets home, to where her father, Charlie, the police officer, is:

    “Why did she hit you?”

    “Because I kissed her,” Jacob said, unashamed.

    “Good for you, kid,” Charlie congratulated him.

(via wejustkeepswimming)

I didn’t read the citation first. I read the quote. I thought I was reading a woman’s account of how she was about to be raped, not a fucking passage from a romance novel.

(via karenfelloutofbedagain)

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

(via snoterella)

still having this argument with people tho

(via cunthulhu)

it is this passage that people (rightfully) hate twilight

everyone knows that edward himself isn’t much better

(via unsexybeast)

There are bitches who swear this entire pile of tripe passing for young adult literature is the ideal romance.

And the entire series is like this. I didn’t just “jump” on the Twilight-hating bandwagon because I thought it was cool. The minute I heard the plot I knew it was going to be rage-inducing. I gave the books a chance and lo and behold I was fucking right.

(via thegoddamazon)

Motherfucking CHRIST. I did NOT know twilight was this bad.

( via fromthemindofateenagewolf)

All of this. ALL. OF. THIS. :<

jane-valjane: #you’re lying if you don’t ship them #there are...

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 17:03:04 -0800

jane-valjane:

#you’re lying if you don’t ship them

#there are two kinds of people in the world #those who ship johnlock #and those who have never seen Sherlock

BWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YIIIIIIIISSSS!

OMG YES. I WANT ALL OF THESE CARDS. ALL OF THEM. LOTS OF THEM. I...

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 16:04:38 -0800

OMG YES. I WANT ALL OF THESE CARDS. ALL OF THEM. LOTS OF THEM. I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE IN MIND!